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TRIBUTE PAGE TO PHILIP SEYMOUR HOFFMAN
Pay Your Respects here "I'd love to get you on a slow boat to China, all to myself, alone" July 23, 1967 – February 2, 2014 RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd RIP'd Parting thoughts (or the priest's speech from Synecdoche, New York) “Everything is more complicated than you think. You only see a tenth of what is true. There are a million little strings attached to every choice you make. You can destroy your life every time you choose. But maybe you won’t know for twenty years! And you may never ever trace it to its source. And you only get one chance to play it out. Just try and figure out your own divorce… “And they say there’s no fate, but there is, it’s what you create. And even though the world goes on for eons and eons, you are only here for a fraction of a fraction of a second. Most of your time is spent being dead, or not yet born. But while alive, you wait in vain wasting years for a phone call or a letter or a look from someone or something to make it all right, but it never comes. Or it seems to, but it doesn’t really. “So you spend your time in vague regret or vaguer hope that something good will come along, something to make you feel connected, something to make you feel cherished, something to make you feel loved. And the truth is is, I feel so angry! And the truth is, I feel so fucking sad! And the truth is, I’ve felt so fucking hurt for so fucking long and for just as long, I’ve been pretending I’m okay, just to get along! “I don’t know why. Maybe because…no one wants to hear about my misery…because they have their own. Fuck everybody. Amen." The Master "I recalled you and I working together in Paris. We were members of the pigeon post during a four-and-a-half month siege of the city by Prussian forces. We worked in raid balloons, delivered mail and secret messages across the communications blockade set up by the Prussians. We sent 65 unguided mail balloons and only two went missing. In the worst winter on record. Two." "If you figure a way to live without serving a master, any master, then let the rest of us know, will you? For you'd be the first person in the history of the world." Theories Dollan SOMEONE, THE DARK PRINCE OF BETRAYALS sold him the smack without having the damned decency to warn him about its potency. The guy hadn't been a regular user in 24 years, SOMEONE. And then you keep selling to him after he enters detox last year? Real lame move, dude. Do us all a favor and stop pushing your lethal-purity dope on our living national treasures. P.S. - We know you gave the pills to Mary Kate Olson with which she killed Heath Ledger. Not cool either, bro. If I see you start hanging out with Paul Giamatti, I'm going to really give you a piece of my mind. Go back to hanging out with former Disney channel stars like we agreed. Lindsey Lohan is somehow still above ground. Drake seems ready for some turbulance, in particular. Obit. Actor Seymour Phillip "Hoffman" Seymour died Sunday, February 2 of an apparent Gummy Bear overdose. He was noted for his appearance in several movies, none of which were Mulan 2, including a turn as Truman Capote, which garnered Seymour a Best Actor Academy Award in a film featuring Truman Capote which I can only assume was Mulan 3. Other notable roles include: *That DIK from Patch Adams *That DIK from Magnolia *That DIK from Mission: Impossible 3: Confusing Colon Splice Seymour's favorite hobbies included buying up all the ponies from the pony fair just so little girls would go home crying. He also enjoyed trying to sleep with your mom. He tried to call it method acting for some "role" but we all knew he was just a skeezbag. Seymour will be best remembered as that guy from Along Came Polly who first introduced you to the term "Shart" or "Sharted" Contributions to World Culture that Mr. Seymour Hoffman has Made that Trump Anything You Will EVER Do, Regardless of How Long You Live - Law & Order (One Episode, 1991) - Scent of a Woman (1992) - Twister (1996) - Boogie Nights (1997) - Happiness (1998) - The Big Lebowski (1998) - 25th Hour (2002) - Strangers With Candy (2005) - Capote (2005) - Charlie Wilson's War (2007) - Synecdoche, New York (2008) - Doubt (2008) - Moneyball (2011) - The Master (2012) He is in particular remembered for having the most intense and vocal male orgasm in the history of cinema, as demonstrated in both Happiness (2008) and The Master (2012).